1. The heart beats about 72 times in a minute, about 4200 times in an hour and about 1,00,000 times in a day.
2. The heart needs about 250 ml. of blood in a minute for its own use.
3. The heart mainly utilizes oxygen for converting food into energy. But in an emergency it can break food particles without oxygen (anaerobic oxidation) for some time.
4. The heart is an extraordinary device for maintaining blood circulation (slightly more than a gallon in the adult body) through approximately 60,000 miles of blood vessels.
5. Our body has about 5 litres of blood, and about 25 trillion red blood cells which carry oxygen from the lungs to all the body tissues. Everyday about 200 billion new red blood cells are released into the bloodstream and the old cells are removed.
6. During an average human life-span of 70 years, the heart pumps between 30-40 million gallons of blood. It beats nearly 2.5 billion times. Despite all the work it does, the heart is only the size of our fist. Despite its small size, the heart uses about 20 per cent of the total blood circulated to supply to its own muscles with oxygen. Unlike other muscles of the body, the heart works unceasingly, even while a person is asleep.
7. The heart is truly a remarkable piece of natural engineering. Day and night, whether we are sleeping or exercising, mere 250-350 g of heart muscles continue to act as our vital pump, maintaining the circulation of blood through our body with smoothness and coordination that any mechanical engineer could only marvel at, and certainly never hope to replicate it in a man-made system.
*6/283/5*
When using computers to excess you soon get degeneration of the discs -degeneration of the joints takes place much later. And it can be prevented. If you use a computer for more than six hours at a time you should try regularly, at least every other day, to massage the neck area and I would suggest that you yourself massage the jaws, the temples and the neck muscles. You have to do it on a regular basis. There is no way of avoiding this. Otherwise the problem just accumulates. People get panic attacks, terrific neck tension, they get tremendously stressed, all because of the tightening of the neck. Even the vertebral arteries, which feed the subconscious brain, can become restricted, causing what has come to be known in my clinic as the Ali Syndrome. This is a recognisable set of symptoms including fatigue, blurred vision, dizziness, nausea, short-term memory loss, confusion and lack of verbal expression, tinnitis, autoimmune disorders, loss of libido, menstrual dysfunctions in women, depression, disturbed sleep, craving for sugar, hyperventilation and palpitations, burning mouth syndrome, mood swings, allergies, poor immune system with frequent coughs and colds, impotence … Need I go on? You don’t want it, do you?
*102\330\8*
GENERAL CARE OF THE ADULT SPINE: MECHANICAL STRAIN ON THE NECK (REPETITIVE STRAIN INJURY) – USING COMPUTERSWhen using computers to excess you soon get degeneration of the discs -degeneration of the joints takes place much later. And it can be prevented. If you use a computer for more than six hours at a time you should try regularly, at least every other day, to massage the neck area and I would suggest that you yourself massage the jaws, the temples and the neck muscles. You have to do it on a regular basis. There is no way of avoiding this. Otherwise the problem just accumulates. People get panic attacks, terrific neck tension, they get tremendously stressed, all because of the tightening of the neck. Even the vertebral arteries, which feed the subconscious brain, can become restricted, causing what has come to be known in my clinic as the Ali Syndrome. This is a recognisable set of symptoms including fatigue, blurred vision, dizziness, nausea, short-term memory loss, confusion and lack of verbal expression, tinnitis, autoimmune disorders, loss of libido, menstrual dysfunctions in women, depression, disturbed sleep, craving for sugar, hyperventilation and palpitations, burning mouth syndrome, mood swings, allergies, poor immune system with frequent coughs and colds, impotence … Need I go on? You don’t want it, do you?*102\330\8*
It is a chronic, infectious, constitutional disease caused by treponema pallidum. Infection commonly enters through abrasion of the skin and mucous membrane.
What is primary syphilis?
After a period of 21 days following sexual contact the primary lesion of syphilis known as chancre appears. Lesion occurs on the genitals as a hard, rounded, dull red lesion with a button like feel. In the male ulcer is generally at the sides of the frenum. In the female the labia majora and minora or the cervix uteri may be the site while the vagina generally escapes. Lips, tongue and breasts may also develop such type of ulcers.
What is secondary syphilis?
Secondary syphilis, the stage of active dissemination is characterised by the appearance of lesions called syphilides. The syphilides may be macular, papular, vesicular, bullous, pustular or polymorphous. At the end of 45 days the early sore throat and first rash i.e. roseola appears. There is a hard painless enlargement of glands along with headache. Joint pain, mucous patches in the mouth and condylomata in anal region are seen.
What is tertiary syphilis?
Tertiary lesions appear after four years or so and cause much deeper damage. These are of 2 types: nodular and gummatous. Gumma develops as a deep, subcutaneous, painless nodule. As the tumor slowly increases in size it becomes attached to the overlying skin which becomes purplish in colour. Ulcerative gumma is usually a large, single, deep punched out ulcer with a slough covered base and irregular edges.
Can a new born suffer from congenital syphilis?
Yes, if parents are suffering from active syphilis the new born may suffer from this dreadly disease. When the child is between one month and so a generalised dark red or copper coloured eruptions on face, buttocks and neck.
*124\301\2*
WHAT IS SYPHILIS?
It is a chronic, infectious, constitutional disease caused by treponema pallidum. Infection commonly enters through abrasion of the skin and mucous membrane.
What is primary syphilis?
After a period of 21 days following sexual contact the primary lesion of syphilis known as chancre appears. Lesion occurs on the genitals as a hard, rounded, dull red lesion with a button like feel. In the male ulcer is generally at the sides of the frenum. In the female the labia majora and minora or the cervix uteri may be the site while the vagina generally escapes. Lips, tongue and breasts may also develop such type of ulcers.
What is secondary syphilis?
Secondary syphilis, the stage of active dissemination is characterised by the appearance of lesions called syphilides. The syphilides may be macular, papular, vesicular, bullous, pustular or polymorphous. At the end of 45 days the early sore throat and first rash i.e. roseola appears. There is a hard painless enlargement of glands along with headache. Joint pain, mucous patches in the mouth and condylomata in anal region are seen.
What is tertiary syphilis?Tertiary lesions appear after four years or so and cause much deeper damage. These are of 2 types: nodular and gummatous. Gumma develops as a deep, subcutaneous, painless nodule. As the tumor slowly increases in size it becomes attached to the overlying skin which becomes purplish in colour. Ulcerative gumma is usually a large, single, deep punched out ulcer with a slough covered base and irregular edges.Can a new born suffer from congenital syphilis?Yes, if parents are suffering from active syphilis the new born may suffer from this dreadly disease. When the child is between one month and so a generalised dark red or copper coloured eruptions on face, buttocks and neck.*124\301\2*
In Homoeopathy and Bach Flower Remedies, the patient as a whole—all parts of his body and his mind—is considered as one unit, and the treatment covers the whole person of the patient. The medicine selected gives relief to all parts of the body where some relief is called for, and therefore the patient feels better. In Homoeopathy the prescription is based on the mental and physical state of the patient, and a remedy is selected which covers the mental disturbance of the patient, also relieves the local troubles in the various parts of the body.
In Dr. Sehgal’s Revolutionised Homoeopathy, all physical symptoms of the patient are ignored and only the mental symptoms of the patient are taken into account, a remedy with suitable potency has to be searched from hundreds of homoeopathic medicines. In Dr. Bach Flower Remedies, no physical symptoms are to be considered, and only mental symptoms are taken into account. Here the suitable remedy, based on only mental symptoms are taken into account. Here the suitable remedy, based on only mental symptoms, is to be selected out of only 38 remedies and the problem of finding the correct potency does not exist.
Bach Flower Remedies is therefore the simplest and safest way of treatment and the best for self-treatment
When we say that treatment by Bach Flower Remedies is based on only mental symptoms, it does not mean that this treatment is confined to mental cases only. It simply means that the patient is cured both physically and mentally by the remedy which is prescribed on the basis of mental symptoms only.
*24\308\8*
BACH FLOWER REMEDIES: DR. BACH’S PHILOSOPHY – THE BASICS OF BACH FLOWER REMEDIESIn Homoeopathy and Bach Flower Remedies, the patient as a whole—all parts of his body and his mind—is considered as one unit, and the treatment covers the whole person of the patient. The medicine selected gives relief to all parts of the body where some relief is called for, and therefore the patient feels better. In Homoeopathy the prescription is based on the mental and physical state of the patient, and a remedy is selected which covers the mental disturbance of the patient, also relieves the local troubles in the various parts of the body.In Dr. Sehgal’s Revolutionised Homoeopathy, all physical symptoms of the patient are ignored and only the mental symptoms of the patient are taken into account, a remedy with suitable potency has to be searched from hundreds of homoeopathic medicines. In Dr. Bach Flower Remedies, no physical symptoms are to be considered, and only mental symptoms are taken into account. Here the suitable remedy, based on only mental symptoms are taken into account. Here the suitable remedy, based on only mental symptoms, is to be selected out of only 38 remedies and the problem of finding the correct potency does not exist.Bach Flower Remedies is therefore the simplest and safest way of treatment and the best for self-treatmentWhen we say that treatment by Bach Flower Remedies is based on only mental symptoms, it does not mean that this treatment is confined to mental cases only. It simply means that the patient is cured both physically and mentally by the remedy which is prescribed on the basis of mental symptoms only.*24\308\8*
We often say we need to take the weight off our feet, when in fact it would be much better to relieve the spine of the crushing pressure of an unbalanced head. Ten minutes on the floor in the middle of the day, or whenever you are tired, can:
• Take the pressure off the spine
• Allow the bones to fall into a natural position
• Improve the circulation.
Stop! Just for ten minutes:
1 Lie on your back with your knees bent and your feet flat on the floor.
2 Stretch your neck by placing a few paperback books or a firm pillow at the base of your skull.
3 Stay there for ten minutes then get up slowly.
It would be ideal if you could imagine your spine becoming straight and flexible as you lie there, but if you cannot – and continue to work out your income tax or write mental shopping lists during the exercise – you will still benefit because of being in this position.
*122\326\8*
HE BONES – BODY MECHANICS: THE BACKBONE – TAKING THE WEIGHT OFF THE SPINEWe often say we need to take the weight off our feet, when in fact it would be much better to relieve the spine of the crushing pressure of an unbalanced head. Ten minutes on the floor in the middle of the day, or whenever you are tired, can:• Take the pressure off the spine• Allow the bones to fall into a natural position• Improve the circulation.Stop! Just for ten minutes:1 Lie on your back with your knees bent and your feet flat on the floor.2 Stretch your neck by placing a few paperback books or a firm pillow at the base of your skull.3 Stay there for ten minutes then get up slowly.It would be ideal if you could imagine your spine becoming straight and flexible as you lie there, but if you cannot – and continue to work out your income tax or write mental shopping lists during the exercise – you will still benefit because of being in this position.*122\326\8*
A skin rash may be the first sign of an allergic reaction to phenobarbital (or to any other drug). A child who develops a skin rash during the first two to three weeks of treatment with any anticonvulsant should immediately be seen by his physician. While most such rashes are NOT caused by the drug, continuing the drug in a child who is allergic to it may lead to severe and even fatal consequences.
Side effects that are dose-related are seen in certain children. The most important side effects of phenobarbital in children are its impacts on learning and behavior. While these side effects can occur in any child if the blood level is sufficiently high, certain individuals may react adversely even at “normal” blood levels.
Phenobarbital can also cause sedation (sleepiness). Many children become tolerant of this tired feeling. In others, the tired feeling continues and they do not tolerate the drug. Giving phenobarbital at bedtime may help to minimize this problem. Disturbances of sleep also can occur from use of the drug.
Hyperactivity, a behavioral side effect, may occur in 2.0 to 40 percent of young children taking phenobarbital. Hyperactivity is more common in children who were quite active to begin with. In one study, more than half of the children had to be taken off this drug because of the side effects of irritability and behavior problems.
Effects of phenobarbital on a child’s learning ability may be its most disturbing side effect. These symptoms may be subtle and difficult to recognize and may account for some of the learning problems previously attributed to epilepsy itself. Most, perhaps all of these side effects are thought to disappear when phenobarbital is discontinued. Recent studies have also found an increased incidence of depression in adolescents who take phenobarbital, perhaps more frequent when there is a family history of depression. In some children, a depression thought to be caused by an emotional reaction to having epilepsy disappears when another medication is substituted for phenobarbital.
We prefer, for all these reasons, not to use phenobarbital when alternative drugs are available, especially because of our concern about its effects on learning and behavior in the vulnerable young child. When we do use it, we carefully monitor the child’s behavior and school performance.
*118\208\8*
DRUGS FOR PARTIAL SEIZURES AND TONIC-CLONIC SEIZURES: REACTIONS TO PHENOBARBITAL AND OTHER BARBITURATE DRUGSA skin rash may be the first sign of an allergic reaction to phenobarbital (or to any other drug). A child who develops a skin rash during the first two to three weeks of treatment with any anticonvulsant should immediately be seen by his physician. While most such rashes are NOT caused by the drug, continuing the drug in a child who is allergic to it may lead to severe and even fatal consequences.Side effects that are dose-related are seen in certain children. The most important side effects of phenobarbital in children are its impacts on learning and behavior. While these side effects can occur in any child if the blood level is sufficiently high, certain individuals may react adversely even at “normal” blood levels.Phenobarbital can also cause sedation (sleepiness). Many children become tolerant of this tired feeling. In others, the tired feeling continues and they do not tolerate the drug. Giving phenobarbital at bedtime may help to minimize this problem. Disturbances of sleep also can occur from use of the drug.Hyperactivity, a behavioral side effect, may occur in 2.0 to 40 percent of young children taking phenobarbital. Hyperactivity is more common in children who were quite active to begin with. In one study, more than half of the children had to be taken off this drug because of the side effects of irritability and behavior problems.Effects of phenobarbital on a child’s learning ability may be its most disturbing side effect. These symptoms may be subtle and difficult to recognize and may account for some of the learning problems previously attributed to epilepsy itself. Most, perhaps all of these side effects are thought to disappear when phenobarbital is discontinued. Recent studies have also found an increased incidence of depression in adolescents who take phenobarbital, perhaps more frequent when there is a family history of depression. In some children, a depression thought to be caused by an emotional reaction to having epilepsy disappears when another medication is substituted for phenobarbital.We prefer, for all these reasons, not to use phenobarbital when alternative drugs are available, especially because of our concern about its effects on learning and behavior in the vulnerable young child. When we do use it, we carefully monitor the child’s behavior and school performance.*118\208\8*
Type 2 diabetes has long been known to be associated with accelerated coronary heart disease. Typically, people with type 2 diabetes have an atherogenic lipid profile, characterized by elevated plasma triglycerides, low plasma HDL cholesterol levels, and increased population of small, dense LDL particles. An important consideration is that these alterations are frequently seen in the very early stages of type 2 diabetes, during the stage of impaired glucose tolerance or metabolic syndrome. Thus, even before the appearance of fasting hyperglycemia and a definitive diagnosis of diabetes, patients are at high risk for cardiovascular events due, at least in part, to persistent dyslipidemia. Fortunately, clinical trial evidence has rapidly accumulated to support aggressive lipid-lowerjng treatment strategies in type 2 diabetes.
The ADA and the National Cholesterol Education Program (NCEP) Adult Treatment Panel III (ATP III) have now joined forces in recommending that diabetic patients be treated for lipid alterations with the same intensity as nondiabetics with established coronary heart disease. This is a major policy shift for NCEP(ATP III). In its recent report, this group recognized that people with diabetes or metabolic syndrome have extremely high cardiovascular risks. The new features of this important report are as follows:
1. Focus on multiple risk factors
• Raises persons with diabetes without CHD, mostof whom display multiple risk factors, to the risk level of CHD risk equivalent.
• Uses Framingham projections of 10-year absolute CHD risk (i.e., the percent probability of having a CHD event in 10 years) to identify certain patients with multiple (2+) risk factors for more intensive treatment.
• Identifies persons with multiple metabolic risk factors (metabolic syndrome) as candidates for intensified therapeutic lifestyle changes.
2. Modifications of lipid and lipoprotein classification
• Identifies LDL cholesterol <100 mg/dl as optimal.
• Raises categorical low HDL cholesterol from < 35mg/dl to < 40 mg/dL (men) because the latter value is a better measure of depressed HDL.
• Lowers the triglyceride classification outpoints to give more attention to moderate elevations (>150 mg/dl).
3. Support for implementation
• Recommends a complete lipoprotein profile every 5 years in patients > 20 years of age. Fasting levels of total cholesterol, LDL cholesterol, HDL cholesterol, and triglycerides as the preferred initial test.
• Encourages use of plant stanols/sterols and viscous (soluble) fiber as therapeutic dietary options to enhance lowering of LDL cholesterol.
• Presents strategies for promoting adherence to therapeutic lifestyle changes and drug therapies.
• Recommends treatment beyond LDL-lowering for persons with triglycerides >= 200 mg/dl.
*168\357\8*
LIPIDS/LIPOPROTEINS: A CONSENSUS FOR INTENSIVE MANAGEMENT OF LIPIDS AND LIPOPROTEINS IN TYPE 2 DIABETESType 2 diabetes has long been known to be associated with accelerated coronary heart disease. Typically, people with type 2 diabetes have an atherogenic lipid profile, characterized by elevated plasma triglycerides, low plasma HDL cholesterol levels, and increased population of small, dense LDL particles. An important consideration is that these alterations are frequently seen in the very early stages of type 2 diabetes, during the stage of impaired glucose tolerance or metabolic syndrome. Thus, even before the appearance of fasting hyperglycemia and a definitive diagnosis of diabetes, patients are at high risk for cardiovascular events due, at least in part, to persistent dyslipidemia. Fortunately, clinical trial evidence has rapidly accumulated to support aggressive lipid-lowerjng treatment strategies in type 2 diabetes.The ADA and the National Cholesterol Education Program (NCEP) Adult Treatment Panel III (ATP III) have now joined forces in recommending that diabetic patients be treated for lipid alterations with the same intensity as nondiabetics with established coronary heart disease. This is a major policy shift for NCEP(ATP III). In its recent report, this group recognized that people with diabetes or metabolic syndrome have extremely high cardiovascular risks. The new features of this important report are as follows:1. Focus on multiple risk factors• Raises persons with diabetes without CHD, mostof whom display multiple risk factors, to the risk level of CHD risk equivalent.• Uses Framingham projections of 10-year absolute CHD risk (i.e., the percent probability of having a CHD event in 10 years) to identify certain patients with multiple (2+) risk factors for more intensive treatment.• Identifies persons with multiple metabolic risk factors (metabolic syndrome) as candidates for intensified therapeutic lifestyle changes.2. Modifications of lipid and lipoprotein classification• Identifies LDL cholesterol <100 mg/dl as optimal.• Raises categorical low HDL cholesterol from < 35mg/dl to < 40 mg/dL (men) because the latter value is a better measure of depressed HDL.• Lowers the triglyceride classification outpoints to give more attention to moderate elevations (>150 mg/dl).3. Support for implementation• Recommends a complete lipoprotein profile every 5 years in patients > 20 years of age. Fasting levels of total cholesterol, LDL cholesterol, HDL cholesterol, and triglycerides as the preferred initial test.• Encourages use of plant stanols/sterols and viscous (soluble) fiber as therapeutic dietary options to enhance lowering of LDL cholesterol.• Presents strategies for promoting adherence to therapeutic lifestyle changes and drug therapies.• Recommends treatment beyond LDL-lowering for persons with triglycerides >= 200 mg/dl.*168\357\8*
Causes of Pericardial Effusion.
Pericardial effusion can be caused by inflammatory pericarditis as well as other factors. These include heart attacks, cancer extending into the pericardium, or kidney failure.
Cardiac tamponade may occur when there is bleeding after heart surgery, infections, tuberculosis, radiation treatments for some kinds of cancer, and trauma.
Symptoms of Pericardial Effusion. If the heart is not compressed by the collection of fluid, there may be no symptoms.
Cardiac tamponade produces symptoms of inadequate heart function, because the heart is unable to pump blood effectively to the lungs and body. People with tamponade are obviously ill. Their skin may have a bluish discoloration because of lack of oxygen. They may be short of breath, anxious, light-headed, or dizzy, and they may go into shock.
*218\252\8*
PERICARDIAL DISEASE: PERICARDIAL EFFUSION – CAUSES AND SYMPTOMSCauses of Pericardial Effusion.Pericardial effusion can be caused by inflammatory pericarditis as well as other factors. These include heart attacks, cancer extending into the pericardium, or kidney failure.Cardiac tamponade may occur when there is bleeding after heart surgery, infections, tuberculosis, radiation treatments for some kinds of cancer, and trauma.Symptoms of Pericardial Effusion. If the heart is not compressed by the collection of fluid, there may be no symptoms.Cardiac tamponade produces symptoms of inadequate heart function, because the heart is unable to pump blood effectively to the lungs and body. People with tamponade are obviously ill. Their skin may have a bluish discoloration because of lack of oxygen. They may be short of breath, anxious, light-headed, or dizzy, and they may go into shock.*218\252\8*
Many people even perform their range-of-motion exercises before they get out of bed in the morning. This may be important for you if your hips, knees, ankles, or feet are affected by arthritis. You may want to get a sense of how the exercise feels standing and then try to duplicate the same motions while sitting down or lying. It is also possible to perform all your range-of-motion exercises in water. This is a wonderful way to get the benefits of buoyancy, as water sometimes makes it possible to perform exercises that otherwise cannot be done.
Strengthening exercises can also be performed in a variety of ways. You can do most of them sitting or lying. We use an exercise band for strengthening, but there are many ways to obtain the same type of resistance without using one. We have mentioned several alternatives in the text.
These exercises need not be performed in any particular order, although an exercise regimen should always begin with range-of-motion or stretching exercises. For instance, you may want to do several range-of-motion exercises first and then do some strengthening exercises. Or, you may want to perform exercises joint by joint (always beginning with some range-of-motion or stretching exercises). Some people like to do all of the floor exercises first and then move on to the sitting ones before performing the standing exercises, last. Other people combine exercises. It’s a good idea to try different approaches so you can discover a series of exercises that is comfortable for you.
*77/209/5*
RHEUMATOID ARTHRITIS (RA) AND SPECIFIC EXERCISESMany people even perform their range-of-motion exercises before they get out of bed in the morning. This may be important for you if your hips, knees, ankles, or feet are affected by arthritis. You may want to get a sense of how the exercise feels standing and then try to duplicate the same motions while sitting down or lying. It is also possible to perform all your range-of-motion exercises in water. This is a wonderful way to get the benefits of buoyancy, as water sometimes makes it possible to perform exercises that otherwise cannot be done.Strengthening exercises can also be performed in a variety of ways. You can do most of them sitting or lying. We use an exercise band for strengthening, but there are many ways to obtain the same type of resistance without using one. We have mentioned several alternatives in the text.These exercises need not be performed in any particular order, although an exercise regimen should always begin with range-of-motion or stretching exercises. For instance, you may want to do several range-of-motion exercises first and then do some strengthening exercises. Or, you may want to perform exercises joint by joint (always beginning with some range-of-motion or stretching exercises). Some people like to do all of the floor exercises first and then move on to the sitting ones before performing the standing exercises, last. Other people combine exercises. It’s a good idea to try different approaches so you can discover a series of exercises that is comfortable for you.*77/209/5*
Q: You mentioned the need for parents to become strong advocates for their ADHD children. One area in which I’d like to help my ADHD daughter a bit more is the social arena. She desperately wants to make and keep friends, but her behavior makes this difficult. How can I help?
A: Most normal children make friends by getting involved in school life. They learn to negotiate their way through the school culture by meeting with teachers, discovering support systems with peers, and finding gratification through academics or sports.
However, this scene can be a source of deep frustration and depression for youngsters with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. They want desperately to be a part of their peer group, but their inattention, hyperactivity, aggressiveness, and immaturity can be off-putting. Their peers find them strange or frightening and want nothing to do with them. As a result, ADHD youngsters are often the butt of cruel jokes and taunts, which only compounds their poor self-esteem.
Adding to the problem is the fact that children with ADHD are frequently subjected to difficult impulses and feelings they don’t know how to modulate, and they often have trouble reading social cues. There may also be an overpowering need for impulsive action and a difficulty in focusing attention, all of which makes it hard for them to succeed on a play date. However, play dates are important because they are a way of learning how to deal with people and manage in the world later in life.
Parents can help arrange friendships for their ADHD children, but it must be done delicately and sensitively. The first step is to look at the lay of the land in terms of your young child’s peer group. Look for a child who might be sympathetic in playing with your child, then facilitate their interaction. Invite the child over for a play date, and be part of it. Be watchful for your child’s need to change activities, and take quick control so that the other child doesn’t feel disrupted. If you notice that your child is becoming restless or aggressive, change the venue. Go out for ice cream, or take the children to the beach or a park, where they can run around to their hearts’ content.
Of course, if you’re dealing with a child of preteen or teen age, parental involvement must be done even more sensitively. Obviously, you can’t call up schoolmates and make a play date for your teenage daughter, but there are other ways to facilitate peer experience. Go out of your way to take your child wherever her schoolmates enjoy hanging out, for example, or invite others over for dinner and perhaps a movie. And while school is a very good place to find potential friends for your child, don’t forget church groups and other social environments.
It may also help to “coach” your ADHD child on certain essential social skills, such as making eye contact when talking with someone, letting someone finish talking before speaking, respecting physical boundaries (i.e., not hugging or touching everyone they meet), interpreting body language, initiating a conversation and, perhaps most important of all, coping with rejection. For most of us, these skills are just second nature. Strangers become friends with very little effort. But social skills can be a foreign language to children with ADHD. Coaching them now will enhance their chances of making friends later on.
All of this requires involvement, diligence, and a major investment in time. It can be very hard to maintain, especially if you have other children—but the payoff, in terms of your child’s self-esteem and emotional growth, can be spectacular.
*93\173\2*
HOW TO HELP CHILD WITH ADHD TO MAKE AND KEEP FRIENDS?Q: You mentioned the need for parents to become strong advocates for their ADHD children. One area in which I’d like to help my ADHD daughter a bit more is the social arena. She desperately wants to make and keep friends, but her behavior makes this difficult. How can I help? A: Most normal children make friends by getting involved in school life. They learn to negotiate their way through the school culture by meeting with teachers, discovering support systems with peers, and finding gratification through academics or sports.However, this scene can be a source of deep frustration and depression for youngsters with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. They want desperately to be a part of their peer group, but their inattention, hyperactivity, aggressiveness, and immaturity can be off-putting. Their peers find them strange or frightening and want nothing to do with them. As a result, ADHD youngsters are often the butt of cruel jokes and taunts, which only compounds their poor self-esteem.Adding to the problem is the fact that children with ADHD are frequently subjected to difficult impulses and feelings they don’t know how to modulate, and they often have trouble reading social cues. There may also be an overpowering need for impulsive action and a difficulty in focusing attention, all of which makes it hard for them to succeed on a play date. However, play dates are important because they are a way of learning how to deal with people and manage in the world later in life.Parents can help arrange friendships for their ADHD children, but it must be done delicately and sensitively. The first step is to look at the lay of the land in terms of your young child’s peer group. Look for a child who might be sympathetic in playing with your child, then facilitate their interaction. Invite the child over for a play date, and be part of it. Be watchful for your child’s need to change activities, and take quick control so that the other child doesn’t feel disrupted. If you notice that your child is becoming restless or aggressive, change the venue. Go out for ice cream, or take the children to the beach or a park, where they can run around to their hearts’ content.Of course, if you’re dealing with a child of preteen or teen age, parental involvement must be done even more sensitively. Obviously, you can’t call up schoolmates and make a play date for your teenage daughter, but there are other ways to facilitate peer experience. Go out of your way to take your child wherever her schoolmates enjoy hanging out, for example, or invite others over for dinner and perhaps a movie. And while school is a very good place to find potential friends for your child, don’t forget church groups and other social environments.It may also help to “coach” your ADHD child on certain essential social skills, such as making eye contact when talking with someone, letting someone finish talking before speaking, respecting physical boundaries (i.e., not hugging or touching everyone they meet), interpreting body language, initiating a conversation and, perhaps most important of all, coping with rejection. For most of us, these skills are just second nature. Strangers become friends with very little effort. But social skills can be a foreign language to children with ADHD. Coaching them now will enhance their chances of making friends later on.All of this requires involvement, diligence, and a major investment in time. It can be very hard to maintain, especially if you have other children—but the payoff, in terms of your child’s self-esteem and emotional growth, can be spectacular.*93\173\2*
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